Gen X? Gen Y? Gen Z?
Lately, I have been surfing bridal websites to gather ideas for the upcoming celebration. In this popular local forum, there's a section where people posted relationships problem. I took a peep occasionally, in short, I'm just being kaypoh. Most of the times, it was heartbroken wives or girlfriends that wrote in to air their grievances against their unfaithful partners. Then, there will be a group of regular forummers who would input their valuable experiences. While their intentions were good, I do not agree on their harsh tactics in attempt to wake up the foolish parties.
Well, this is the cyberspace. There is no accountablility to anyone, probably to your own conscious that you don't end up as a cyber bully. But this is not my point.
Recently. there are m0re threads on handling in-laws problems. How can I, the Miss Kaypoh miss it? On this particular day, this topic caught my eyes and turned my usual half opened mini eyes into big round popping raisins. " How do I get rid of my MIL (aka mother-in-law)? " screamed right in the middle of my screen.
I thought it was the usual mother-in-law vs daughter-in-law saga, fighting for the dowager/ empress' rights at home and competing for the "emperor's " affection. In this case, it was not the usual drama-mama saga but a girl who has not even married the son and now, thinking of getting rid of the mother-in-law.
More drama then your Korean weppy show.
A synosis of her story :
Miss Kat said she cannot get along with her boyfriend (bf)'s mum. Her boyfriend has mentioned that when they get married, they have to stay with his mum, who by the way, is a single parent who singlehandedly raised up her boyfriend.
Miss Kat cited a few examples on the unpleasant exchanges with her potential mother-in-law.
Example 1:
There was once I bought some food for my bf and she (MIL) commented that eat this kind of food so unhealthy, eat already sure kena heart attack. She is those super healthy and boring types that eat lotsa vitamins, brown rice and vegetables.
Example 2:
I feel so restricted at my bf's house. I was watching TV and the mum just took the controller and changed the channel, knowing I'm watching the TV. How rude!
Miss Kat continued to say that now her bf is staying in a small condo with his mum. So she guessed they have to buy a bigger house and the bf said his mum cannot downgrade.
She asked for advices on what she is going to do?
Oh please, Miss Kat. Are you sure your bf wants to marry you in the first place? Take health supplements and eat healthily is boring? Then I rather be boring than to use my money and feed the doctors. You are at his house, not your own house. Of course, there's restrictions. You think you are the mistress of the house already?! And are you going to fault his mum because now your bf has to work doubly hard and save more, to buy a bigger house so that everyone can live in peace? Grow up, please!
Is it the young people now or is it me just being old-fashioned minded? Nowadays, the young people literally stay at their gf/ bf's house for good. My former boss's son stayed with his gf at her house everyday, don't even go back to see his parents. I also noticed many postings on the forum regarding their MIL stemmed from the fact they stay at their bf's house and complained about the MIL.
What are these young people thinking of? Firstly, they are staying under someone else's roof for free. Secondly, why is there a need to stay at the bf/gf's house? If you say, sleep over once a week, I still can reason it out. Thirdly, you go over as a guest and still want to complain about their folks?
I posed this question to darling and asked if he will allow his son's gf to stay with us, in their courtship days. Not the sleep over, once or twice a week but the 5-7 days type. His answer left me shaking my head.
His reply was better to let the gf stay in our house, otherwise we may lose our son. Huh?!
I guess it is with this kind of mentality of the parents that bring out the worst of the future generation. The children would sense your insecurity and use that as emotinoally blackmail against the parents.
His mentality is to stay together as a family. But who said that staying together will forge the unique family bond? There are many families out there, who are literally strangers under the same roof. Do they care about each other? Do they really have that family bond? Everyday, everyone is just so busy with their own lives.
Children are God's gift. They are to be loved and nurtured to be a good person that will benefit the society. Not to be held on like a prized possession and refuse to let go. Children will grow up and one day, they have to take up responsibilities amd form their own family unit. The parents shouldn't be afraid to let go. If you have been instilling good moral values to your children, will your children grow up to be ungrateful and complacent adults? Will they not remember you as their parents who loved and cared for them since birth?
The young people should also consider this when they stay over. You may think you are young, better educated and earn much more than his folks. But don't forget that your path is made much easier because the older generation has already cleared away much road blocks for you.
I pray that when God gives us a son, I will have His wisdom being a good mother. Otherwise, one day, my son's gf may just post the same question.
"How do I get rid of my mother-in-law? ..... She is a boring old lady who insists on having vegetables everyday. Also, she will turn off the TV at 8pm every night, because she needs to do her quiet time. She is also very nagging. Everyday, she will ask me why I don't want to go home. She doesn't welcome me at all. How do treat her as my MIL? And she is freaky clean. She will pick up the hair on the floor and washes the toilet every week. I'm a career woman, I don't have time to do such bo liao things. Can someone please advice me what to do? ......"
*rolling my eyeballs*
Well, this is the cyberspace. There is no accountablility to anyone, probably to your own conscious that you don't end up as a cyber bully. But this is not my point.
Recently. there are m0re threads on handling in-laws problems. How can I, the Miss Kaypoh miss it? On this particular day, this topic caught my eyes and turned my usual half opened mini eyes into big round popping raisins. " How do I get rid of my MIL (aka mother-in-law)? " screamed right in the middle of my screen.
I thought it was the usual mother-in-law vs daughter-in-law saga, fighting for the dowager/ empress' rights at home and competing for the "emperor's " affection. In this case, it was not the usual drama-mama saga but a girl who has not even married the son and now, thinking of getting rid of the mother-in-law.
More drama then your Korean weppy show.
A synosis of her story :
Miss Kat said she cannot get along with her boyfriend (bf)'s mum. Her boyfriend has mentioned that when they get married, they have to stay with his mum, who by the way, is a single parent who singlehandedly raised up her boyfriend.
Miss Kat cited a few examples on the unpleasant exchanges with her potential mother-in-law.
Example 1:
There was once I bought some food for my bf and she (MIL) commented that eat this kind of food so unhealthy, eat already sure kena heart attack. She is those super healthy and boring types that eat lotsa vitamins, brown rice and vegetables.
Example 2:
I feel so restricted at my bf's house. I was watching TV and the mum just took the controller and changed the channel, knowing I'm watching the TV. How rude!
Miss Kat continued to say that now her bf is staying in a small condo with his mum. So she guessed they have to buy a bigger house and the bf said his mum cannot downgrade.
She asked for advices on what she is going to do?
Oh please, Miss Kat. Are you sure your bf wants to marry you in the first place? Take health supplements and eat healthily is boring? Then I rather be boring than to use my money and feed the doctors. You are at his house, not your own house. Of course, there's restrictions. You think you are the mistress of the house already?! And are you going to fault his mum because now your bf has to work doubly hard and save more, to buy a bigger house so that everyone can live in peace? Grow up, please!
Is it the young people now or is it me just being old-fashioned minded? Nowadays, the young people literally stay at their gf/ bf's house for good. My former boss's son stayed with his gf at her house everyday, don't even go back to see his parents. I also noticed many postings on the forum regarding their MIL stemmed from the fact they stay at their bf's house and complained about the MIL.
What are these young people thinking of? Firstly, they are staying under someone else's roof for free. Secondly, why is there a need to stay at the bf/gf's house? If you say, sleep over once a week, I still can reason it out. Thirdly, you go over as a guest and still want to complain about their folks?
I posed this question to darling and asked if he will allow his son's gf to stay with us, in their courtship days. Not the sleep over, once or twice a week but the 5-7 days type. His answer left me shaking my head.
His reply was better to let the gf stay in our house, otherwise we may lose our son. Huh?!
I guess it is with this kind of mentality of the parents that bring out the worst of the future generation. The children would sense your insecurity and use that as emotinoally blackmail against the parents.
His mentality is to stay together as a family. But who said that staying together will forge the unique family bond? There are many families out there, who are literally strangers under the same roof. Do they care about each other? Do they really have that family bond? Everyday, everyone is just so busy with their own lives.
Children are God's gift. They are to be loved and nurtured to be a good person that will benefit the society. Not to be held on like a prized possession and refuse to let go. Children will grow up and one day, they have to take up responsibilities amd form their own family unit. The parents shouldn't be afraid to let go. If you have been instilling good moral values to your children, will your children grow up to be ungrateful and complacent adults? Will they not remember you as their parents who loved and cared for them since birth?
The young people should also consider this when they stay over. You may think you are young, better educated and earn much more than his folks. But don't forget that your path is made much easier because the older generation has already cleared away much road blocks for you.
I pray that when God gives us a son, I will have His wisdom being a good mother. Otherwise, one day, my son's gf may just post the same question.
"How do I get rid of my mother-in-law? ..... She is a boring old lady who insists on having vegetables everyday. Also, she will turn off the TV at 8pm every night, because she needs to do her quiet time. She is also very nagging. Everyday, she will ask me why I don't want to go home. She doesn't welcome me at all. How do treat her as my MIL? And she is freaky clean. She will pick up the hair on the floor and washes the toilet every week. I'm a career woman, I don't have time to do such bo liao things. Can someone please advice me what to do? ......"
*rolling my eyeballs*
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